How to Prepare for Marriage by Our Prayers
Written by Sarah Ann E.
Excerpt taken from the book “Lady in Waiting”
and “Young Ladies for God’s Glory”
Used with permission
Now this article is not written to encourage you all to pray that you will be married. I know that all of us want to be married, but we must be content with the Lord’s perfect will for our lives. When we pray about our possible marriage, we also need to be content to be single for the rest of our life, if that is the Lord's will. The Lord knows what is best for you, better than you know.
First of all, we have to pray for ourselves. We must pray that the Lord will prepare us now to be the perfect mate for Mr. Right. We will not all of a sudden possess the characteristics of a godly wife as soon as we get married. Nor will our perfect man fit all of our personalities, nor will we get along perfectly. You've got another thing coming if you think like that. We need to pray that the Lord would conform us into His image, so that we will be a spiritual encouragement to our husbands. In Genesis 2:18 it says, ". . . I will make him an help fit for him." My pastor says that this can be pictured as a glove. A glove needs to perfectly fit the hand of the owner and it also bends to the owners will. So we, as the glove, need to fit our husband and also be submissive or flexible to his desires. A glove cannot or should not go against the hand. We need to pray that we would be the perfect glove for our husband's hand. We also can prepare for our marriage by learning to cook and sew, but that is beside the point.
"You need to pray for yourself that God would prepare you for him. Most of the same qualities that you pray for yourself, you need to pray for him. You need to pray that you would be submissive to his authority over you in marriage (Ephesians 5:22-25). However, you are under your parents’ or guardians’ authority until you are married.” (from “Young Ladies for God’s Glory")
Secondly, we must pray for our husband. I started to pray for my future husband when I was 12 years old. The most important thing that you can pray for your husband is that he would be saved soon, if he is not already saved. When my mother was 14 years old, she became burdened for her husband’s salvation. Years later, she was to find out that her husband was saved around the time that she was burdened to pray for his salvation. The next thing is to pray that he would be surrendered fully to the Lord to either serve Him at home or abroad. Then you need to pray that he would grow in the Lord and be able to be your future spiritual leader.
“Before considering the specific qualities found in [our] Boaz, one should deal with certain physical stereotypes. Whether you have been looking for a guy who is a bronzed, blue-eyed blonde (“B.B.B.”) or is tall, dark, and handsome ( “T.D.H.”), you need to surrender your desires to the Lord. Everyone has certain preferences. But such a mind-set needs to be given to Jesus. Too many single women have missed wonderful treasures in godly guys because the treasure was not encased in a B.B.B. to T.D.H.. The Lord will probably not require you to [marry] a guy who repulses you physically. But you need to be open to guys who do not fit your desired stereo-type. Too often a guy may satisfy your eyesight, but leave your heart empty and still longing. Remember, after a few years that bronzed, blue-eyed blonde can be transformed into a pale, bald guy with bifocals on those gorgeous eyes.”
“You want to marry someone for the qualities he possesses now, not for the qualities you hope he will develop.” A guy will not change his qualities just because YOU married him. “The most common mistake made by marriage partners is marrying someone they intend to change. Since it is nearly impossible to change a person, you will want to set standards of [courting], or of building friendships, with men who are characterized by the qualities below. A single woman can sidestep a lifetime of tragedy by seriously considering these characteristics” in a young man in which she is interested. So you must pray that he will possess godly qualities now. No man will have all the qualities that you want to perfection. If you are praying for specific godly qualities, then you will be able to detect if he is a man that is pursuing godliness.
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COPYRIGHT PERMISSION
Destiny Image Publishers, Inc., hereby grants Sarah Ann permission to use quotations not to exceed 500 words from "Lady In Waiting", by Jackie Kendall in her newsletter "Ladies in Waiting".
Materials from "Lady In Waiting", by Jackie Kendall, copyright 1995 used by permission of Destiny Image Publishers, 167 Walnut Bottom Road, Shippensburg, PA 17257 www.destinyimage.com
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