Showing a Gentle and Quiet Spirit with Our Mouth
Written by Sarah Ann E.

 

When I hear “Possessing a Gentle and Quiet Spirit” I think, “I have a ways to go before I get close to having a spirit like that.” I have a feeling that I am not the only one in LIW that feels that way! There are many different ways that we need to learn to be more gentle and quiet, such as our in actions, words, and attitude. The Lord has impressed upon me to hone in on one of those areas today, and just think about that ONE thing. That is our words.

We as woman tend to talk A LOT—too much at that. When we give directions to a place, we have to include many landmarks between this street and that one. When we try to describe something, we use as many words as possible that come close to defining it! How about when you call a close friend “just to talk”? I am sure you do not just talk for a couple minutes, unless you have to be somewhere. Believe me; I am speaking to myself too. I do my decent share of talking and more. Just watch yourself and other woman around you for a whole day and see how much unnecessary chatter we do as woman. I have been ashamed at my loud mouth.

I searched google for the number of words a woman speaks each day. The average woman speaks 20,000 words each day. Is that a mouth full or what?!!! Men only speak around 7,000 words in a day. It said that most of woman’s words are about gossip or just because they want to hear their own voice. You think that is silly—just watch yourself! I thought it was silly until I did. It also said that woman speak faster than men. These statistics are utterly amazing. There are several verses in the Bible concerning woman being quiet, and we wonder why. Our Lord knew that it would be a struggle for woman to be quiet. 1 Timothy 3:11 says, “Woman must likewise be dignified, not malicious gossips, but, temperate (which means to exercise self-restraint), faithful in all things.” 1 Timothy 5:13 is speaking about younger widows, but it applies to single woman too. “They also learn to be idle, as they go around from house to house; not merely idle, but also gossips and busybodies, talking about things not proper to mention.” Then Proverbs has a lot to say about the words of an adulterous woman. “For the lips of an adulterous drip honey and smoother than oil is her speech” (Proverbs 5:3). “. . .the adulteress who flatters with her words” (Proverbs 2:16).

Proverbs 4:24 commands “Put away from you a deceitful mouth and put devious speech far from you.” Being deceitful is to deliberately cheat or mislead, and devious means to depart from the right way or to be misleading. Both meanings include gossip. We need to make sure that our words are not being deceitful or devious. It is easy to say “did you hear what so and so did?” or “so and so said this and that.” We are not to spread gossip. In fact, we need to do our best to stop it. As my dad says, if someone says something to us about another person and we don’t think it is true, tell them that we need to go ask him about it. Find out what the truth is and stop the lie. With some gossip we need to keep our mouth shut and forget about it. Proverbs 13:3 says, “The one who guards his mouth preserves his life; the one who opens wide his lips comes to ruin.” Let us remember to put a guard over our mouth everywhere we go.

“Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear” (Ephesians 4:29). Our words need to build others up. Even if you are sad and hurting, ask the Lord to help you to keep a cheerful spirit and be an encouragement with your words. When you meet people, you can say, “Hi!!! Isn’t this such a lovely day that our Lord has given us today?!!!” Ask your friends if there is anything you can pray about for them. Try to be a spiritual encourager with your words. Edify your hearers.

There are times that we need to keep from saying anything, especially if we are mad. It is not good to blurt out our feelings because we will regret what we have said. Proverbs also encouraged us to restrain what we say. “When there are many words, transgression is unavoidable, but he who restrains his lips is wise” (Proverbs 10:19). “He who restrains his words has knowledge, and he who has a cool spirit is a man of understanding” (Proverbs 17:27).

Having a gentle and quiet spirit is precious in our Lord’s sight. He says that very clearly in this verse. “But let it be the hidden person of the heart, with the imperishable qualities of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is precious in the sight of God” (1 Peter 3:4). When someone you really care for says they like a certain thing about you, say they like your hair up, you are probably going to wear your hair up more often because this person really likes it that way (especially if it is a boyfriend). Do we care enough for our Lord to want to do something for Him because He said it is precious in His sight? Let us all work on having a gentle and quiet spirit. Not just when we go out of our house, but when we are at home with our family too.

“Pleasant words are a honeycomb,
sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.”
Proverbs 16:24